New Orleans Datasheet
Hey guys. There's been some discussion that we might need more information and activity for the travel section of Swoop to survive. There's a lot of old datasheets that got pushed to the side with the RVF changes, so I decided to revive one of my old ones to make it easier for people to read and potentially discuss the changes. This is from early 2018, so I doubt much has changed since I wrote this about New Orleans but if it has, this could be a good place to share those changes.

Basically, I spent 4 full days in the city last year for a big event. Got to do a lot of the nightlife, observe the tourists and locals, along with finding a few other fun things to do besides drink. Going into this, I thought it might be the last city with a true cultural identity left in the United States and the American version of a free for all that we experience in SEA or LA/SA. Well, after being there, both of those thoughts held up.


The airport is about a 25 minute drive from the French Quarter. It's small and right in the middle of neighboring local stores. There's very minimal public transportation throughout the city besides Uber, so it's important to plan accordingly in this department.

Luckily, once you get downtown, everything around there becomes very walkable. New Orleans has the advantage of not being too big but not being too small to walk. This is great because you don't need public transportation to get around the main parts of the city like you do in most other major US cities plus there's always new gems to discover.

For hotels/apartments, get one downtown or in the French Quarter. There's a few hotels near Canal Street and ideally, that's where you really want to be to bring girls back. Off the top of my head there's a Sheraton on Bourbon Street, Marriott on Canal, plus a Hilton two minutes down the road. Airbnb can also come up clutch here. I had one within 10 minutes walking distance from Bourbon, which had a rooftop.

Other Tourist Attractions

Besides the obvious partying and gaming, there are actually a wide variety of things to do in New Orleans. For historical tourism, my friends did a Plantation Tour, I checked out the WWII Museum, there's a swamp tour about 40 minutes away to check out alligators.

Jackson Square can be a good spot to hang out for a little bit. Watch the hustlers over there though. In particular, there's this group of black guys who pretty much do reverse racism jokes and dance for white tourists. It was hilarious at first but they make you realize how dumb tourists can be. I remember watching and they hyped up that they were going to jump over seven people. They start by lining everybody up standing and before they do the jump, they ask for a 20 or a 10 from the tourists otherwise they'll show up to your house (the reverse racism joke). Anyway, I look closely from the top to see what's being put in. The damn tourists actually gave them 20's and 10's because they asked for them. I don't know what the fuck is wrong with people sometimes. They asked before the jump, then basically made them all bend down and get very close together. They did better moves earlier but I thought it was a worthy story to share. The kicker: my friend asks his friend who went there last year if he knows of the group. He did and said they're well known by people who have been.

For other day time entertainment, I highly highly recommend checking out Frenchman Street. We went on a Saturday afternoon where a lot of the local jazz bands came out. One guy in particular played trumpet for two different bands. You can find several just walking down the block. We didn't get a chance to go back at night, but one club has jazz bands play almost every night at 10 on that street. If you don't mind the hipster vibe or just like live jazz music, this is your place.


Going to keep this part simple but the main local specials seem to be alligator, cajun chicken, and muffalettas. Fried alligator is delicious, especially with remoulade sauce. As an Italian, I could appreciate NOLA's version of a muffaletta. These all seem to be everywhere and of course, get some cajun barbecue. Cajun jambalaya pasta is also really solid.

Bourbon Street and Girls

This is definitely more of a weekend spot. I went here almost every night and the difference between a weekend and a Monday night is literally night and day. I theorize the weekend may even be a bit safer because there's more tourists walking around, plus a million bachelorette/bachelor parties and a few party buses.

There's some staple drinks known on this street, but one I'd absolutely do for a pre-game drink is a Hurricane at Patty O'Brien's. My group listened to live music there but the hurricane kept us there. I had like 3-4 different ones, this was the only strong one. The rest I wasn't crazy about. There's Huge Ass Beers which I thought was mostly a gimmick, Grenades which I thought were kind of weak, and fishbowls. Out of the last three, I'd say fishbowls are the best bang for buck. I was stone cold sober before I drank one even after having some beers, the fishbowl got me back in the mood to game.

Specific bars I can remember are Blacksmith, which I agree is more of a date spot. Dark bar with a piano in the back, plus it's the oldest bar in America supposedly. The Swamp has a mechanical bull in the back. I didn't find it until Monday, but I feel like this would be a great spot to try to flirt with drunk girls trying to ride the bull. Krazy Korner has a very spacious balcony and two floors. Beach on Bourbon has three rooms but a tight dance floor and very aggressive shot girls. Guys, you know better so this doesn't apply to you, but I've seen some girls get guys to drop $50 in a few minutes with shots around their boobs. One black shot girl got pretty aggressive trying to get me to do it but I just saw her hustle my friend so I wasn't having it. I legit grabbed her arm and threw it back, giving her kind of a death stare like don't fuck with me. There's a couple others with balconies, I'd recommend one of them.

I did hit up two strip clubs on Bourbon. The two are Larry Flynt's and Stiletto's. The first was interesting. Both have a patio in the back where you can smoke with beds they use in the summer. I took a seat in one and talked to a stripper for a bit there. And if you hint that you are willing to drop big money, they'll take you up to the second floor that's a bit smaller with a balcony right outside overlooking the street to smoke. Good place to hang out as long as you just stick to lap dances. It's very apparent some strippers will hustle guys they think are more beta. Again, don't think you guys have to worry about this situation but I think it's worth noting. I hinted I had experience with strip clubs and I wasn't stupid with money. I got three different quotes for 30 minutes in a private room. The same exact room I believe. All prices were expectedly ridiculous, but one girl quoted the room for double the price that two others did to me and one girl knew I had an eye for the Asian strippers (she noticed me with another one) and I think tried to get more out of me for falsely assuming I'd give into a fetish. Obviously I didn't do anything in the private rooms, but lap dances there are $30 for like 3-4 minutes and they don't do as much as ones in other parts of the country. Stiletto's tried to quote $50 for a lap dance on a Monday. I laughed in the girl's faces and told them they're nuts if they'd think I'd pay for that.

As for girls, there's a lot of bachelorette parties in the bars, some southern US tourists, and then you have the random Filipina/Asian groups and the horny MILFs/low class girls. I didn't target the bachelorette girls too much because I don't like the tiara thing they do to feel entitled. Southern US girls have less of a bitch shield from what I noticed but you do still need western game. For these girls, the keys seem to be to dress casually but still nice. I wore a button down and slacks one night. Don't go this route unless you're an extremely high energy person. I don't have that luxury so as a mid 20's guy, I looked a little too old and formal than I should have when wearing that. MILFs can be had as well. For them, it seems confidence is key and bring something to the table. The Asian girls I had a very hard time cracking despite my time out in that part of the world. They seem to mostly stick to themselves unless you get like an 8 Asian girl.

I noticed as the weekend went on, you run into a lot of seedy people on Bourbon. I thought going in this was more in the suburbs, but I had five different people offer me coke in about five hours on Monday night without me bringing it up even remotely. Those guys really seem to come out during the week. Plus, pros were rampant during the week. Seriously, 20% of the girls I approached that night ended up being pros and most weren't dressed like a typical pro. Just try not to approach girls that look like they're sitting alone during the week. I made that mistake because that's my usual preference as oppose to a group of five when I'm by myself or only have one friend with me.


I feel like New Orleans in some ways is one of the most underrated cities in America. Honestly, it didn't feel like an American city at all to me. They own their cultural identity, their history, and really have a good definition of freedom by American standards. This city will let you make or break on your own with few repercussions. I do think travel/game experience is very important before coming here. This would not be a city I'd take friends again to that don't know the hustle or have seen similar hustle in cities outside of the country. I have and it saved my ass this time. If I was a noob, I would've made a lot of mistakes here with the temptations around.

You can have a great time here if you know western game and lock down logistics. You just gotta remember New Orleans can also be a sketchy city that has an underbelly. If you watch yourself like you would anywhere else though, you'll be fine.
Probably the city in the States I'd be most interested in visiting, nice datasheet!
+1 repped.
I heard new orleans has got some hot black girls. similar in Houston also. thinking about visiting both. just deciding whens the best time to visit? mardigra or maybe best to avoid that time I don't know...
Resurrecting this thread from last year. Looks like work is taking me there at the end of this month, and part of the time I'll be there is during Mardi Gras. Anyone have any advice on that?

I imagine Bourbon Street is jam-packed with tourists (and petty criminals) but I'm wondering if it'll be too packed to even grab a drink. What parts of town do the locals go to celebrate? Any Mardi Gras-specific game advice?

I've been to NoLa before a few times, but mostly during the week and usually did a walk up and down Bourbon and that's it. There is a cool speakeasy directly on Bourbon, above a regular bar. You need a password to get in, and it's got a balcony overlooking the street. I've taken clients there to get hammered and they were impressed since it's slightly higher class than the usual "$5 hurricanes" places on the street level.

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