The Game Engine: Expectation Management

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In this post I want to put forward a thought that may help you coping with some setbacks or even a bad streak in your game.

You have to realise that game isn’t an exact science. An approach that works great for the first girl, won’t work on the next. Or even if you would have approached the same girl, the same way but at another time, the outcome could have been different.

Don’t take the rejection personal.

We never know all the factors at play, there’s always element of chance to it. Especially for the initial stages of attraction, when you are just meeting new girls.

You should manage your expectations accordingly:

  • Not every girl you will approach in the club will want to talk to you. You’ll get shot down cold occasionally. Deal with it.
  • Not every interaction will give lead to a number or kiss close.
  • Not every number you get or girl you kiss will turn into a date or lay.

Manage your expectations and accept that these ‘failures’ are required to get the results that you want.

Compare your game to a heat engine. As explained in thermodynamics, even the best possible heat engine won’t ever reach 100% fuel efficiency. Energy is always lost to heat.

You have to accept these losses. Strive to reach for ‘high efficiency’ by improving your game, but accept this can never be 100% and failure is inherent to game.

Use expectation management to not take rejection personal. In order to succeed, you must fail (and repeat, and repeat, and repeat).

So set your goals: “I will approach at least 10 girls today” and don’t beat yourself up if you don’t pull a girl or if you didn’t get enough number closes.

But DO beat yourself up if you don’t live up to your these goals; if you didn’t make those approaches.

Because even when your game isn’t perfect, you will get the results if you put in the work. Your “game engine” will use more gas to the mile, but you’ll get ahead either way and your game will improve by doing so.

It’s a win-win. Get out there. Make it happen.



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